When I Grow Up: Being Mom

“What did you want to be when you grow up?” I curiously asked my Mother-in-Law on our way to lunch with my two little ones. We had been talking about my business and how my Brother-in-Law was finishing up school to be a lawyer, and I was dying to know what she had imagined herself doing when she was little. I was expecting something like be a teacher, or a ballerina because she is a very ambitious woman.

She looked at me on that windy mountain road and said, “I wanted to be a mom”. I was a little shocked. My Mother-in-Law, a successful business woman, wanted to be a mom. She proceeded to explain that she, “lived in a generation where they didn’t ask girls what they wanted to be. Everyone assumed you would be a mother, and that the man would take care of working.” And that was that.

Obviously, in this day and age, we live in a world where girls are, asked what they want to be, and are encouraged to pursue those dreams. You can see women picking themselves up by the bootstraps to make a better life for themselves everywhere you go. From the single mother who works and finds time to get to every school function to the first generation college student working several jobs to put themselves through school, there is no lack of talented up and coming women. I was one of these rising stars in the eyes of my peers, and then I got married and found out soon after that I was pregnant.

As a mother and a business woman, sometimes the lines get blurred by sleepy eyes, sick kids, a working husband, dirty house, and the other 500 items I still have to check off my list and I lose sight of my ambitions and dreams. Before I became a mom, I was convinced I could conquer the world, and at the time, I was. Then we found out we were pregnant with our precious little girl 4 years and 5 months before I planned on even trying to get pregnant. Thus, my five-year plan didn’t work out as well as I had hoped and the people that had been giving me accolades for my accomplishments before were not impressed with me creating human life. I fell into depression and walked around blankly for many months with no clue what I was supposed to do with my life and feeling completely useless to my husband, society, and to myself. My success had been what gave me value and being a mom with dirty hair, dark circles, and puke on every shirt did not make me feel valuable at all.

One day I woke up though, and had to ask myself what I wanted to be when I grow up. I had forgotten my passion and drive because I became focused on what society told me after I had a baby, that I was not as valuable, that I was “wasting my life”. I had to change my thought process and “stick it to the man” so to speak. I decided that I would rise above the assumptions of my circle of family and friends and show them that I could be a mom and follow my dreams, even when those dreams have temporarily changed or are put on hold.

I can tell you not everything I thought would be happening in my life right now is happening, and that is okay. I am a mom first and foremost, but I will not let society shame me for thinking about my future as well and neither should you. We have to stick together as moms and not degrade every parenting style and life choice everyone makes. Take the time to take care of you today because if you are empty, you cannot give anything you don’t have to your kids. They will thank you later for taking care of you, your husband will thank you, and you will thank you. Don’t throw your dreams away. They may be on hold or temporarily change, but hold onto them and like Walt Disney said, “Keep moving forward” because you got this momma!

 

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7 thoughts on “When I Grow Up: Being Mom

  1. Everyone should mom in the way that suits them best! I stay home with my son, but I also have my own business, and it can be hard to manage both, but I love that it gives me balance. I also love that my son will grow up seeing a woman work hard and be successful doing something she loves. I hope it is something that resonates with him when he gets married and has his own kids someday!

    1. It will! My husbands mom owns her own business as well, and it has helped my husband realize how I work as a person. It is tough, but it’s so great you are doing what you love! What is your business about?

  2. I think that being a mom is SO tough and an incredibly amazing tough responsibility. I recently made the decision to start my own business, but I know that when I have kids someday I won’t have to throw away those dreams. It will be hard, but I can’t wait for that day! Congrats to you for doing what so many of us don’t have the courage to achieve!

    Keep smiling!
    Molly | http://www.stylemissmolly.com

    1. You are right you won’t, which is the great thing about running your own business! It will change, but I get a lot of content ideas from my kids so they are my little blog helpers. And thank you, you will enjoy littles when they come. 🙂

  3. I’ve been saying that I want to be a mom since I was a little girl. Now being 19, and slowly approaching that time in my life, I couldn’t be more excited about that, but I also really want to accomplish other things. This post was awesome!
    Xoxo takingonthekitchen.weebly.com

    1. That is so great! I met my husband in college when I was 19 and actually never planned on having babies so quick, but God had other plans when we found out we were pregnant 7 months in! I hope you get to accomplish all your dreams! But be open to go with the flow of life because you might add a new dream and adventure!

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